I mentioned, in previous blog entries regarding my visit with my parents back in Wise County Texas, that my dad was a complete jerkface while I was there. In his defense, he’d had all his choppers pulled and had them replaced with two metal spikes that hold his brand new choppers in…and because he’s such a colossal baby when it comes to pain - he was really in a bad mood. He couldn’t eat, I’m shocked he slept, since he’d been camped out in the Lazy Boy with the dogs in the living room for my entire visit, plus, he’d managed to somehow wrench the tendon that runs down the back of your ankle (Achilles I think he said?) and he was in an aircast/walking cast for most of my stay (or, I should say, he was supposed to be…*sigh* men…). At any rate, he was an ass, but he had a good reason, so the assholiness is a bit more forgiving than it would have been had he, say, just been an ass for no reason at all.

Anyway - so one night, I am sitting in the living room, we’re watching ____ (Pick one, its all they watch: Jeopardy, Wheel of Fortune, Animal Police, PRCA Rodeo (I know it wasn’t The Bold and The Beautiful or The Young and The Restless, because dad was home and well, “I don’t watch that shit!”)). So we’re watching T.V. and dad yells from the living room to the office, “Hey Soretha!!! We got any ice cream” (Now, my dad is a total redneck, so you have to imagine it will all the correct redneck annunciation and emphasis on the wrong parts…so “Soretha” comes out more like “Sooooooo Retha!” - he really draws out the “So” part - and it’s not even pronounced that way. Anyway, I digress…) She answers, “Yeah! In the freezer” so I happen to say, “Mmmm ice cream, that sounds good” and dad (who hasn’t managed to get up and fix a plate of anything for himself since I got there) goes into the kitchen and makes not ONE bowl of ice cream - but TWO! One for me and one for him.

It totally freaked me out! It was like I was back in that parallel universe I talked about a few months ago…with the Twilight Zone Theme playing in the background…

I looked at my dad and said, “I am SO going to blog about this!” (of course, he has no idea what a blog is, even though he has this super fantastic new 20 inch wide screen HP Laptop with built in 10-key (drool)).

So, Dad, I blogged about it (and FYI, this is a blog. Blog is short for “Weblog” it’s kind of a public online journal where everyone can read your most inner thoughts, then make fun of you).

As for the rest of ya…dad started feeling better the day before I left and wasn’t quite the jerkface he’d been in previous weeks. He got appropriately mushy when I left and has called a few times (because he misses me so much…I just know it!) since I got home.

Anyway, I meant to blog about this while I was there, but totally forgot - so I did it now Yay!

Trackback URI | Comments RSS